Mark and Avoid Series: The Transformed Wife

An Introduction

Recently, I shared a meme on my social media profiles that seemed to spark a series of posts and conversations. The meme was inspired by some posts I had come across from good, Christian pages who innocently shared a quote from an unorthodox source. One page in particular promptly removed the post once some of their followers voiced their concerns and for that they gained more respect from me than I already had for them.

Now, most Christian pages will, at one point or another share content from questionable people. I myself have shared content from the same person in question here, but once I realized what this person really believed, I (hopefully) went back and deleted any quote of hers I had shared.

     One page however did not heed the advice of people and proceeded to leave the post from the questionable source up. This is where the inspiration of the meme directly came from and before I go any further I believe this needs to be said. As Christian pages, and even Christians in general, with social media accounts, we should not be sharing content from people who are false teachers. EVEN IF WHAT THEY SAY IN THAT PARTICULAR POST IS TRUE. In doing so we could inadvertently lead people to these false teachers. Even a broken clock is right twice a day, but it doesn’t mean we should hang it on our wall. We have a responsibility to call out false teachers publicly and unapologetically, not share their content.

     Now for the questionable source that people have been sharing quotes from. Her name is Lori Alexander and she goes by the moniker, The Transformed Wife. She runs accounts on various social media platforms. As of the time that this article was written, she has a following of 48.9 thousand people on Instagram, 38 thousand people on X, and 158 thousand people on Facebook. This is a women with a great amount of influence in the social media sphere and that is exactly why those of us who are able to, should call her out for the false teacher she is.

     Now, I do want to clarify that my criticisms are nothing new. I made the mistake of following Lori sometime after I started The Concerned Christian Conservative on Facebook. It wasn’t long before I began to notice what she really believed and who she followed. Unfortunately, I had already shared some of her content and I very much regret it. I hope and pray I did not inadvertently send anyone her way. I have, as I previously mentioned, since deleted all of her posts (hopefully) from my Instagram and Facebook pages.

     Originally, this was meant to be one article on why she should be marked and avoided, but the more I wrote and the more I thought, the more I realized that it would be best to make this a series, so I can cover things more thoroughly. For those who have read other articles critiquing her, I doubt I’ll bring up any new allegations, but I hope in splitting the topics up into multiple articles, that I can expound on each of them a little more deeply and hopefully add something of value to this discussion.

The topics I intend to tackle in this series, are as follows:

Denial of the doctrine of Original Sin.

The hyper-patriarchal misunderstanding of Titus 2.

Bad marital advice. (Some of you know what I’m getting at here.)

Over generalization and lack of nuance.

Lack of grace and lack of an understanding of the gospel.

The legalism she promotes.

The false teachers she follows and adores. (Bill Gothard, the Pearls, and the IBLP)

Anything else that I believe is worth addressing. (Followers are more than welcome to send in suggestions on any social media platform.)

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     Just as Paul anticipated objections and answered them in Romans, I also anticipate objections by people. Particularly the people that make up TTW Horde and even those I refer to as the Conn Mob. I will go ahead and address said anticipated objections.

Objection 1: What About Matthew 18?

Matthew 18:15–20 (ESV): “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector. Truly, I say to you, whatever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”

Matthew 18:15-20 is not a passage about dealing with false teachers. This passage is the very first set of instructions given to us in regards to church discipline within the local body. The passage is dealing with the situation of an individual within the local body sinning against another individual within the local body and gives instructions to the leaders of the body on how to handle such situations. Though, an individual can try to contact a person who is publicly teaching false doctrine, it is not necessary. It is our job as Christians to publicly call out those who are publicly teaching false doctrine and extra biblical things.

Objection Number 2: You’re Just Jealous

     My criticisms have nothing to do with jealousy. I have stated before that the key to having a bunch of followers is to not be a Calvinist, refrain from posting about Reformed Theology, never disagree with things like The Chosen series, etc…

Basically do one of two things. One, only post “inspirational” Christian quotes or  two, consistently post hot takes that amount to nothing more than theological trash. While the second option is more Lori’s style, if that’s what I cared about, I’d definitely go with option 1 and take notes from Joel Osteen. However, I’ll never sacrifice truth for followers.

Objection Number 3: You Must be an Egalitarian

     To the egalitarians that have found their way here, allow me to disappoint you. I have never, nor will I ever hold that view. Though I disagree with the belief of hyper-patriarchy that Lori and others hold, I believe there is balance to found in patriarchy and complementarianism without going to an extreme on both sides. I have stated before that the views I hold would bother those that hold to patriarchy and possibly infuriate those that hold to complementarianism and infuriate egalitarians. I firmly believe in gender roles as the Bible prescribes. The following are just a couple of examples. Women can’t be elders/pastors/preachers. Men are to lead their homes. I urge all people that hold to egalitarianism to repent of their rebellion against God and His word.

Though I disagree with the belief of hyper-patriarchy that Lori and others hold, I believe there is balance to found in patriarchy and complimentarianism without going to an extreme on both sides.

Objection Number 4: You Must Be a Feminist

Once you criticize TTW, her horde will accuse you of two things. One, as mentioned previously, they’ll accuse you of being an egalitarian. Two, they’ll accuse you of being a feminist. Sadly, this is true even among the reformed camp and to be honest, I still, for the life of me, cannot figure out why some reformed people support her in the first place. It should be common sense that rejecting an extreme view does not automatically place a person on the other end of that extreme. I reject and abhor the feminist ideology that our secular culture pushes.

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So, why am I going through so much trouble to do this series? Because I have daughters. Because there are fellow Christians out there with daughters. Because there are women out there who are  new converts looking for answers, or were converted at a young age and never taught proper theology regarding gender roles and now they’ve stumbled upon TTW and think her view of biblical womanhood is the correct one, when in fact her view is not only an unbiblical extreme, but is harmful to women and breeds weak men.

I am not writing this series for those that currently support the belief of hyper-patriarchy and follow TTW. I fully believe that God can and does bring people out of this cult like mentality, but usually these people have their minds made up. These people are usually never satisfied with short answers and brush aside any lengthy explanation one might give to explain their disagreement with TTW and those with similar views. It is not my goal to change their minds, but to provide in depth responses to back up our criticisms and hopefully keep people away from that ideology that have not already fallen for it.

Odds are, TTW will end up blocking me on all of her accounts before I’m able to finish this series. After all, it will take some time to finish this endeavor and she doesn’t handle criticism well. This project will not be completed overnight. It could possibly take a year or more, so I hope people are patient with me.

For those that follow TTW, I am well aware that I have not elaborated on anything in this article. It is not the point of it. The point of this article is to explain what I intend to cover and answer throughout this series and cover the objections and accusations that you often bring up when someone criticizes your golden calf.

To those that disagree with me, you are more than welcome to write similar articles about me. I also welcome rebuttals from TTW and her followers, so long as they have exegeted what I have written and give a biblical response from scripture that has been properly exegeted. This may prove difficult though, because the typical responses are usually eisegeted from verses that are used alone and have been ripped from their context.

      As a side note before I begin this series, as always I assume that the reader is a born again Christian. I will write and word things as if that is the case. If you are not a follower of Jesus Christ, I urge you to consider your sinfulness, realize the depth of your transgressions, and understand that you have, since birth, rebelled against your creator and realize you are in need of a savior. Christ died and shed his blood so that you could receive life and I urge you to repent and believe on the Lord Jesus Christ.